To answer the question, you must classify the event. I’ve developed a completely unscientific taxonomy after years of fieldwork (looking out the window while eating toast).
Type 1: The Phantom Drizzle
This is the most common answer to “Did it rain last night London?” The answer is both yes and no. It’s a mist that feels like a ghost sneezing on your face. You cannot prove it rained, but your hair is now a frizzy mess. Verdict: technically yes, spiritually no.
Storm Éowyn: A Powerful Force Unleashed on the UK and Ireland - Weather
Type 2: The Terrific Downpour
This one is obvious. You know it happened because the street became a river, and you heard it hammering your window like a drunk landlord demanding rent. This rain is rare—maybe three times a year. Enjoy it while you wade to the Tube.
Type 3: The Selective Revenge Rain
A personal favorite. It rains on your street but not on the one parallel. You check your weather app, which shows a smiling sun, while you’re soaked. This is psychic warfare designed by the rain gods to gaslight you.
Type 4: The Passive-Aggressive Rinse
Starts around midnight, stops at 1 a.m., then starts again at 5:49 a.m. just to ruin your commute plans. It’s like a cat begging for food at 4 a.m.—unnecessary, but persistent. Verdict: yes, and it was personal.
