Let’s talk about the taxis. I love black cabs. They’re iconic. But they also have a superpower: appearing from nowhere to block an entire junction. It’s like they teleport just to ruin your green light.
London Traffic
They know the Knowledge, but they also choose the most inconvenient routes. It’s a power move. “You wanted to get to Soho? Wrong. We’re taking a scenic detour through a building site.”
And don’t get me started on the U-turns. A black cab will do a U-turn on a dime in the middle of Oxford Circus. Then they’ll wave cheerfully. Rude.
The Great Cycle Lane Standoff
Okay, I love cyclists. I am a cyclist. But let’s be real: the cycle lanes are both a blessing and a curse. They’re everywhere now, and they’ve shrunk the roads to the size of a shoelace.
So you’ve got a bus, a car, a delivery van, and a Boris Bike all trying to fit into one lane. Spoiler alert: nobody fits. Everyone just glares at each other.
It’s a high-stakes game of “Who Will Blink First.” Usually, the answer is nobody, and you just sit there watching the seagulls mock you.
