So why is decaf so bad? Because it’s coffee’s shy cousin who doesn’t know how to dance. It shows up, stands in the corner, and leaves early. We keep inviting it back because we remember what real coffee feels like, and we hope—foolishly—that decaf will surprise us.
It won’t. But we’ll keep ordering it, keep sighing, and keep telling ourselves, “Well, at least I’ll sleep tonight.” And then we’ll take one more sip, grimace, and wonder if caffeine addiction was really so bad after all. Here’s to you, decaf drinker. You’re a warrior of compromise, and your mug is your battle scar.
