Now, the menu is a sacred scroll of grease-fueled wisdom. You’ve got your Zinger burgers, your popcorn chicken, and the legendary Boneless Banquet—a cardboard box that feels like a treasure chest, only greasier. But here’s the secret: always ask for extra gravy. It’s not on the menu, but the staff have a hidden stash, like dragons hoarding gold. I once saw a man cry when they told him they’d run out. True story.
KFC is opening at the Colonnades in Croydon in the last space next to
And surprising fact: this KFC sells more chicken on a Saturday than the entire county of Cornwall does in a week. I made that up, but it feels true because of the constant, glorious chaos. The fryers work so hard, they probably dream of retirement in the Bahamas.
The Staff: Unsung Heroes of the Fryer
Behind the counter, you’ve got a crew of warriors in paper hats. They move with the frantic grace of circus performers, juggling hot baskets, wiping down surfaces, and shouting “Extra crispy?” over the roar of the shake machine. One time, a cashier gave me a free side of wedges because I told a joke about my life falling apart. That’s the Colonnades spirit—chaos equals compassion.
I should note: the staff probably hate the phrase “Can I get a refill?” because it triggers their fight-or-flight response. But they smile through it, like saints in an apron. God bless them.
