Here’s the truth: a Suburban gets terrible mpg by modern standards. But it gets fantastic smiles per gallon. That’s the real metric.
If you want to be practical, buy a minivan. Minivans get 20-25 mpg. They’re cheaper. They’re more efficient. But they don’t look like a land yacht.
A Suburban is a statement. It says, “I need space. I need power. I don’t care about the pump.” And that’s a fun attitude.
One Last Weird Thing
Did you know the Suburban is the longest continuously produced vehicle nameplate? It’s been around since 1935. For 89 years, it’s been guzzling gas.
Back then, it got maybe 8 mpg. Today, it gets double that. That’s progress, people. Slow, glorious, V8-powered progress.
So next time you see a Suburban at a gas station, don’t laugh. Tip your hat. That driver is living a life of fuel-swilling adventure. And they’re having a blast doing it.
As for the mpg? It’s 15 in the city. 20 on the highway. And 100% worth it if you love the ridiculous, wonderful, massive American SUV.
