So, for an 18-pound turkey: preheat oven to 325°F, cook for about 4 hours unstuffed (5 to 6 hours stuffed), thermometer to 155°F in the breast and 165°F in the thigh, then rest it for 45 minutes. If you’re feeling fancy, baste every 45 minutes, but it does basically nothing except make you feel useful. The skin will brown anyway; it’s a biological fact.
One last thing: don’t forget the giblet bag. I once cooked a turkey with the giblet bag still inside, and the bag melted into a plastic goo that smelled like a chemical fire. My guests still bring it up—and not in a good way. Check the neck cavity. You’re a grown adult; you can handle that slimy surprise.
Now go forth and conquer that dinosaur. Your oven is your arena, and that turkey is your gladiator. May the thighs be juicy, the skin shatter like glass, and your gravy be lump-free. You’ve got this.
