Some people open multiple tabs. This does not help. This just makes the internet gods angry, and they will punish you by locking your account for “suspicious activity.” You are not suspicious—you are desperate.
Others refresh the page every 0.5 seconds. This is the human equivalent of poking a sleeping bear with a stick. The bear is the server. The stick is your hopelessness.
MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE SUPPORTS ANNOUNCED FOR THE LONG AWAITED STADIUM
The only winning move is to sit perfectly still, whisper a prayer to Gerard Way’s eyeliner, and hope the algorithm takes pity on you. Spoiler: it won’t.
The “Sold Out” Heartbreak
After 47 minutes of watching a spinning wheel of doom, you will see the words: “All tickets have been allocated.” Your soul leaves your body. You briefly consider becoming a juggalo instead.
But wait! Gigs And Tours has a secret second wave called “production holds.” This is like finding out your ex still has feelings for you—technically possible, but emotionally devastating when it turns out to be a lie.
You click “refresh” one more time. A single ticket appears. It’s in the “restricted view” section behind a speaker. The cost? £120. You buy it without blinking. You now own the privilege of hearing “Welcome to the Black Parade” while staring at a PA system.
