Every single excuse he makes is actively worse than the crime. The crime? Small potatoes. The lies? Grand larceny of logic. That’s the real crime.
So here’s to Carson Grimes. The man, the myth, the messy legend. He’s not a role model. He’s a warning. A very, very funny warning.
Next time you get pulled over? Don’t be a Carson. Just say, “I messed up.” You’ll save yourself the humiliation. And the TV fame.
