Here’s the takeaway, my anxiety-ridden friend: tampons are designed to be temporary residents, not permanent settlers. They cannot migrate to your spleen, your brain, or your left elbow. The only way they “get stuck” is if you leave them in too long and they become a stinky squatter, or if you break the tiny string. And in both cases, your body has a way out, and so does your doctor.
So next time you feel that phantom “Oh god, where did it go?” sensation, take a deep breath. Do the squat. And remember: it’s not lost. It’s just playing hide-and-seek in a very small, very warm room that you are the landlord of. You’ve got this. Now go change your tampon and enjoy your coffee.
