If you’re a swan in the UK, your life is probably pretty safe. No one’s coming to tax your nest. But if you’re a human who wants to eat a swan? Don’t. It’s illegal (and gross). And if you harm one, you could technically be charged with damaging royal property—yes, that’s happened before. A man in 2018 was arrested for shooting a swan, and the Crown Prosecution Service explicitly cited the “property of the Crown” clause.
So, to answer the question: Are all swans owned by the King? No, not all. But the fluffier, hissier ones that poo on your picnic blanket in London? Yeah, those are his. Sort of. In a very old, very British, very confusing way.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going back to the river. I need to make sure that swan I saw earlier isn’t pulling a royal attitude on me. Because if it is, I’m going to have to ask for its paperwork.
